Dalis’ banters in ToB

* * *

Haer'Dalis -

Anomen... a moment of your time, if I may. I have been observing your combat tactics recently and I wish to ask you a question.

Anomen -

For what do you bother me, tiefling? I need no further comments on how I may improve my fighting style from a prancer such as yourself.

Haer'Dalis -

On the contrary, dear Anomen. It is your style I now most admire, and wish to emulate.

Anomen -

Truly? Well then... ask what you will and I shall strive to answer as best I may. Perhaps my technique shall save your life in combat some day.

Haer'Dalis -

Combat? Oh no, you misunderstand. I would use your style for my stage performances... it is far too florid and grandiose for effective use in battle.

You see, even in my fanciest spins there is always efficiency and conservation of movement... as there in any fighting style. Except yours. Perhaps your overblown thrusts and stabs are the result of your overblown ego?

Anomen -

I have better things to do than listen to your prattling!

Haer'Dalis -

Very well. I shall watch you from afar, good hound, and learn what I may from mere observation.

* * *

Haer'Dalis -

Edwin! You continue to be the most dour of companions. I worry for your humor.

Edwin -

You shall see a great improvement in my disposition when I have left this petty business behind.

Haer'Dalis -

Ah, great and future plans, but is not tomorrow uncertain? Could not the end of all just as likely occur today as in a millennia?

Edwin -

You assume my death to be inevitable, but perhaps I think beyond those terms. Mortality seems escapable by others, so why not me?

Haer'Dalis -

Edwin, do you remember the name of the ancient Netheril god of the sea?

Edwin -

Eh... no.

Haer'Dalis -

Everything ends, Edwin. Everything dies. The dust of a god looks much the same as yours and mine will.

Edwin -

For a bard, I doubt you are much fun at parties.

* * *

Haer'Dalis -

Ahh, Imoen, my wildflower. Have I ever told you you’ve a most natural grace and innocent beauty about you? T’is something any man would find most charming.

Imoen -

Yeah, okay, whatever. I don’t know about my grace, HaerDalis’, but I’m not all that innocent. I can smell a cheesy come-on from a mile away.

Haer'Dalis -

‘Twas not meant as such. I’ve no intention of offending you.

Imoen -

Uh-huh.

Haer'Dalis -

T’is only that I see you in an unguarded moment, at times ... and I see the ache in your heart reflected in your eyes. It saddens this sparrow to know there is no-one to hold you close, Imoen.

Imoen -

I ...

Haer'Dalis -

But no doubt I over-step my bounds by saying so. It has only ever been my hope that you might one day give me the chance to be the one that comforts you. It would be an honor, my wildflower.

Imoen -

Whew. Gosh, you’re good.

Haer'Dalis -

Yes, I know. T’is an art form that has served this sparrow well, at times.

Imoen -

Write a book. I’ll buy it.

* * *

Jan -

Haerry, could I draw upon your bardic prowess to help me with a little poem I'm working on? It's a tribute to our fearless leader.

Haer'Dalis -

I truly wish you would call me by my proper name, Jan. But I shall be happy to collaborate with you on such an epic subject.

Jan -

Great, Haerry. I knew I could count on you. I'm off to a pretty good start, but I need rhymes for 'purple, 'orange' and 'silver'.

Haer'Dalis -

Ah, well... perhaps you are focusing too much on colors, Jan. Mayhaps we could take this ballad in a different direction.

Jan -

Okay, I'll work on that stanza myself. Maybe you can help me with the next verse. What's a good rhyme for 'bucket'?

Haer'Dalis -

One does spring readily to mind... Listen, my would be sparrow, I do not mean to give offense but perhaps you could let me work with the composition and add my own brand of subtle wit to the mix.

Jan -

Ah, Haerry, let's just forget about it. I was born a storyteller, and a storyteller I'll remain until the day I die. I'm no poet, and I never will be.

Haer'Dalis -

Normally I would encourage an artist such as yourself to branch out, but in this case abandoning the genre may be for the best.

* * *

Haer'Dalis -

My great and noble hound, I sense your spirit is heavy. What troubles the mighty paladin?

Keldorn -

Your observation is most astute, my good bard. I am indeed troubled by our current course.

Haer'Dalis -

But shall your shining example not guide us down the proper path, Sir Keldorn?

Keldorn -

I am not the leader of this group... though even if I were I do not know if it would make a difference. No matter what path Aekanaro chooses, I fear it will be a journey awash in blood.

Haer'Dalis -

Aye, we are but mere players in this tragedy, reading our lines from a grim and heavy script. Though I myself still hold out hope for a happy ending.

Keldorn -

As do I. But life does not always imitate art, and I fear this may be one of those times. Speak of this no further... I do not want to upset the others.

* * *

Mazzy -

Haer'Dalis, why are you constantly staring at me? Do you see something strange?

Haer'Dalis -

Not strange, my tiny hawk... amazing. A great actor may play a giant and, though he stands no taller, he seems to tower over his fellows on the stage.

Mazzy -

Are you saying I look... taller?

Haer'Dalis -

Not in the physical sense. But recently when I look at you I see not only a valiant halfling, but also a warrior-giantess of virtue striding the earth.

Mazzy -

Then I shall thank you for the compliment... though I still think it rude to stare.

* * *

Minsc -

Haer'Dalis, are you laughing at Boo and I? You are smiling after many of our battles.

Haer'Dalis -

Oh, my dear Minsc, you and Boo are wonderful, make no mistake. So chaotic, so unpredictable. Such a fist in the eye of sense and reason.

Minsc -

Uh... but mostly evil, right?

Haer'Dalis -

HA! Yes, Minsc, mostly a fist in the eyes of evil. Do not let me change a thing you do.

Minsc -

Boo, I think this bard is a little off in the head, no?

* * *

Nalia -

Haer'Dalis, you are a playwright... maybe you can answer something for me.

Haer'Dalis -

Ask, my pretty lark, and I shall do my best to satisfy your burning curiosity.

Nalia -

Why is it that so many of the great tragedies have royalty as their central characters, but the great comedies focus on the common people?

Haer'Dalis -

Ah, that is truly a question for the ages and the sages. Perhaps tragedy is the noblest of dramatic forms, and as such demands a noble subject?

Nalia -

Maybe it's because most playwrights are common folk, at least in the class structure sense. Maybe they resent the abuses of the rich and powerful, and see their art as a way to symbolically destroy the upper class.

Haer'Dalis -

Your explanation lacks the soaring wings of poetry, Nalia dear. It is far too rooted in the troubles of the real world. The stage is our escape from mundane life.

Nalia -

But shouldn't art be more than an escape? Can it not also be an instrument of social and political change? Isn't that more valuable than mere escapism?

Haer'Dalis -

Nalia, escapism has its place - as does dramatic social commentary. But attempting to determine their relative worth is an argument that will last far beyond our own lifetimes.

Nalia -

True enough, I suppose. Very well, we shall leave this conversation for now. Just as well... we are lagging behind the others.

* * *

Sarevok -

Your sideway glances begin to annoy me, bard. Say your piece or drag your eyes elsewhere!

Haer'Dalis -

Forgive this sparrow’s curiosity, my fierce hound, but my eyes are drawn of their own accord. You have walked where every mortal must go - though precious few return as you have.

Sarevok -

And what of it? Did you think I learned some great secret there? The meaning of life, perhaps? Or some similar foolish notion?

Haer'Dalis -

Nay, I am far too busy living life to wonder at its meaning. But perhaps you could share your experiences with me ... it could make a most fascinating dramatic work.

Sarevok -

My experiences? Suffering, tiefling ... suffering which you cannot fathom. Each level of pain worst than the first, each layer of torment bringing new tortures.

Haer'Dalis -

Such passion in your suffering! Imagine a story in which you take me, the author, on a journey through these levels of the abyss ... it is the stuff of a literary masterpiece! Tell me more, Sarevok!

Sarevok -

Beneath the suffering is a constant fire. An incessant, horrible burning - the rage and fury of Bhaal searing my immortal soul. No! I will not relive the agony of that inferno for your amusement!

Haer'Dalis -

Ah, your decision is a great loss to literature. Should you change your mind, my armor plated hawk, come and find me. I already have the perfect title for the work: Dalis’ Inferno.

* * *

Aekanaro -

No, there's no need for an oath. I'm satisfied. Join me and let's go.

Sarevok -

You... will not require an oath? An... odd... choice, sister. I would have required it of you. If I had even let you live. As you wish, then...

Haer'Dalis -

So... The brother joins us, unfettered? A clever gamble, my raven. Perhaps it will pay off, one can never foretell, hm?

* * *

Valygar -

Haer'Dalis! Must you insist on plucking away at that blasted instrument?

Haer'Dalis -

I must keep it in tune, good sir, lest I strike a sour note with my listeners.

Valygar -

Every time you open your mouth you strike a sour note with me, bard.

Haer'Dalis -

A thrust of wit from the dark hawk's rapier! I had not thought it in you, dear Valygar. Have you been practicing your verbal exchanges with the trees? Alas they do not strike back.

Valygar -

Cease your barking, bard and leave me alone.

Haer'Dalis -

"Bark"? "Leave"? Yet more jests, building on my tree remark? Or just lucky puns, like wisdom tumbling from the lips of a fool?

Valygar -

It took you long enough to grasp the root of my remarks.

Haer'Dalis -

Oh mercy, great punsman, I beg thee! Your life of solitude has done nothing to dull the stinging points of your stabbing words. I shall retire to a safe distance, and resume my plucking beyond your earshot.

Valygar -

Thank you, Haer'Dalis. That is all I asked in the first place.

* * *

Viconia -

I feel your eyes roving over me, tiefling. Do you see something you desire?

Haer'Dalis -

Ah, Viconia my dusky jewel... I was merely admiring your natural grace, your striking beauty and your exotic voice. You could surely have made a fine career on the stage.

Viconia -

No doubt, my smooth tongued bard. Yet I chose to put my talents to a greater purpose.

Haer'Dalis -

What greater purpose could there be? 'Tis truly noble to court the approval of the audience.

Viconia -

In drow society we have no use for the theater. We act and dissemble to advance our station. An unconvincing performance ends not with boos and catcalls, but with slow and painful death.

Haer'Dalis -

No use for theater? Please excuse this wounded sparrow's flight, but I must retreat beneath the onslaught of pain such a harsh and unimaginable world brings to my heart.

* * *

Aekanaro -

Tell me about Haer'Dalis.

Volo -

There are few who can match the arts of Haer'Dalis, whether he be twirling blades in combat, unleashing powerful magic on his foes, or invoking the spirit of a legendary hero on stage.

Haer'Dalis -

You are too kind, dear poet. Would that I had the time, it would suit my fancy to join you in your quest to record Aekanaro's tale. Ahhh, what wonders it has already encompassed! Perhaps I will yet have the chance to relate them to you, one day, yes?

* * *

Haer'Dalis -

A life on the planes as a new power? T'is not a life for everyone, my raven. No matter how powerful you assume yourself to be, there is always another stronger... and in the planes, this is doubly so.

But either way your adventure continues, does it not? I envy your position, truly. Naturally, I'd like it best to join you in your future travels, but if it's not meant to be I'll bid you fond farewell, certainly.

Solar -

The time has come to make your choice, Bhaalspawn. What is your wish?

Aekanaro -

I do not want the essence of Bhaal…

And our happy end